There is this beingness that is absolutely free and non-anything, how to describe this?, this is the absolute freedom from any sort of care, remorse, sadness, happiness, you name it. It is the absolute य़ां YAM How can I possibly clarify this, for my own edification, if not for anyone else's? It is a state of utter detachment, it is that which always is there, always is here only when I'm cognizant of it, breathing deeply and purposely helps, Its there at the breath, It corrects things that are wrong, if it's wrong, it gets corrected, i.e., - if it's not wrong it doesn't, what's appropriate, when, some things take more digesting than others, चैतन्यमत्म Caitanyamatma, (Shiva Sutras), Awareness which has absolute freedom of all knowledge and activity is the Self, or nature of Reality